Thank you Claire. I really felt the weight of that line when I wrote it. There’s such a quiet ache beneath those moments of judgement or resistance, isn’t there? Not about them – but about where we stand now.
I had to write down, "the creative world says it loves vulnerability, but only if it's not paired with influence" because it really struck me as a truth I hadn't been able to put into words. Beautifully said.
That line you pulled out is one I kept circling in drafts I’m so glad it landed. There’s something quietly devastating about how we celebrate vulnerability only when it comes from the “right” person or context.
Well said. It’s sad the way people do one another while craving support themselves., without the seemingly simple knowledge that the wind lifts every wing in the room ….
Yes… craving support but forgetting that the wind lifts every wing and a rising tide lifts all boats. We all rise when we stop treating each other like competition.
I’m sorry this has happened to Glennon. The irony is you showed up as you are. Something we need more of.
Outside of follows, likes and subscribes., sooner or later what everyone really wants is authentic connection., to feel ourselves and to be allowed to without judgement.
To stop the crazy. It’s been so long., and so forgotten that few even recognize the opportunity when they see it and when they do it scares the ___ out of them.
Yes yes yes. Thank you for singing the truth here! Yet another successful woman skewered, and thank you for exposing the scarcity mentality and virtue signaling that lives beneath this, yet another, attack on a woman getting big, shining, doing it her way.
Yes yes yes back at you! I so appreciate you naming the dynamics beneath the surface - especially how often “scarcity” shows up dressed as concern or principle. Thank you for reading with such fire and clarity.
This is really thought provoking - the visibility thing makes a ton of sense. Also it makes me think of the societal wounds women bear. We are not supposed to be “too loud,” “too visible,” “too much,” etc. the example of Taylor swift really stood out to me - as a woman who basically does what she wants, she’s so so criticized all the time. And I really think women like this are often seen as a threat to the patriarchy. And if that’s the case then there’s women clearly embedded in the patriarchy that are perpetuating these ideals of persecuting women who are in the limelight. It’s a truly vicious cycle. It’s sometimes subconscious. Like the subconscious wounding of our society.
This is so beautifully expressed, Kelli -and yes, that exact Taylor Swift tension was on my mind too. The way visibility becomes a threat, especially when it’s embodied by women who don’t shrink themselves. And I agree, much of the backlash is subconscious, conditioned, inherited. Thank you for articulating it so powerfully.
I didn’t know who Glennon was and to be honest I didn’t watch all of the welcome video because I didn’t understand the why of the video, but I liked the idea of someone writing about stopping people-pleasing, so I subscribed to hear more. And then I started seeing some posts against Glennon being on Substack. I wish I’d said something then, but didn’t want to get involved because I am not a writer and because I have been a target and don’t relish being a target. But I wish I had said something about understanding how hard it is for writers to get recognition, get published, make a living BUT isn’t there enough room here for everyone who is not writing hate? I wish Glennon had not left. I hope she comes back. And I hope all the writers who are not Glennon know the worth of their writing even if they are not famous or rich. I value so many of you and to me, there’s always room for one more 🙏🏼 Penn x
Penn – this comment moved me. Thank you for your honesty, and for staying with your own values even when the energy around it felt heavy. “There’s always room for one more” is such a beautiful and grounded truth. I hope she comes back too. 😢
I didn’t flinch when Glennon showed up. Maybe because I didn’t know who she was. With Maddow or Katie Phang, I felt the air shift—like someone famous had just sat down at the kitchen table. But with Glennon, I read her words without expectation. Just… curiosity.
And it reminded me of being a teenager in post-punk Northern England. Loving bands no one else had heard of—then quietly resenting them when they got big. I wanted to keep them mine. Intimacy felt like something that couldn’t survive mass attention.
I think a lot of us are still carrying that. The part that confuses belonging with exclusivity, or safety with smallness.
But maybe the room is bigger than we think. And maybe someone else’s spotlight doesn’t mean we disappear.
Robert, what a gorgeous reflection. That post-punk metaphor - wanting to keep things small and special - really struck a chord. You’ve captured exactly why intimacy and visibility can feel at odds, even when they don’t have to be. So beautifully said.
There’ something about those formative moments. When something reveals or reinforces our identity, we quietly, protectively claim it as ours,. Especially when the world around us feels loud, fast, and is seemingly fraying at the edges.
Hi Sam! I had never heard of this person, a friend sent me a link to an article about her after she had already left.
From what I can tell, she joined Substack and immediately started charging for access to her content. If that’s what happened, I totally get why people didn’t like it.
And that’s not a knock on her, it’s just the reality of making money online. Whenever you have a group of people on a platform who are trying to make money, and then one of them DOES start making a LOT of money, someone is going to complain.
It will happen here too, unfortunately. I suspect the writers who had been grinding here for months with little $$$ to show for it yet didn’t like the fact that she could walk in and start making money as soon as she arrived.
You are exactly right, it’s hypocritical for us to say Substack is different and everyone is welcome, then we start running off people who aren’t following the unspoken rules. As you said, it’s simply gatekeeping. Thank you for putting into words what I think a lot of us were already thinking.
Mack! Appreciate you sharing this. And you’re absolutely right, this is where it gets thorny. The irony is, Substack encourages all of us to turn on paid from day one and let’s be honest, someone like Glennon probably didn’t just decide to hop on without a PR plan and a meeting or two with the Substack team. It’s how the platform works: visibility + monetisation from the start.
So the backlash wasn’t really about her charging - it was about what her presence symbolised to others who felt they were grinding without being seen. You’re spot on that it’s all wrapped up in money, pace, and unspoken expectations. Always love your thoughtful take on this stuff - glad we’re in the same corner of the internet.
Good morning, Sam! You’re exactly right, Substack encourages us to monetize immediately.
I’ve been in social media for 20 years now, and this cycle always repeats. Everyone starts out at zero. Eventually, someone figured out how to grow faster than everyone else, and how to make money doing it.
As soon as that happens, criticism will start. The first time I ever got attacked online was the day I announced my book deal. I hate to say, but the same thing will happen here. As soon as some of the people we all know and love start enjoying real success from their efforts on Substack, the attacks will begin.
When someone has success, we can either be happy for them and try to learn from them, or we can attack them out of jealousy. Unfortunately, some people choose the latter.
I agree. This shows that the 'great community over here' feels safe as long as somebody stays average and highlights how, no matter what, there is still so much fear and competition. (I don’t believe there is competition, nor do I think readers are 'mine' or 'yours'). It just makes me wonder what kind of culture is being cultivated here on this platform.
Yes! You’ve put words to something I was circling. The illusion of safety only working when no one shines too much. And I’m with you - I don’t believe in competition in the way it’s framed either, but the fear it stirs up is very real. So much to reflect on here.
I've read a number of posts around this since this incident itself is taking up so much space, oh the irony, but so far you have captured the nuance, layers and complexity of what this fuss is really about. Well said. These are issues we will all need to grapple with as other bigger names join. As for me I'll be sitting in my corner of the cafeteria quietly nurturing and tending my own garden.
Terry, I absolutely love the image of “tending your own garden in the corner of the cafeteria” – such a perfect metaphor for how many of us quietly hold space here. Thank you for seeing the nuance. That was exactly my aim, to name the energy shift without falling into a binary response.
"Not because they’re doing anything wrong. But because they remind us that some people start on a different rung."
Maybe she started here on a different rung. But she very likely started somewhere else years ago on the very bottom, just like everyone else.
And now people are belittling her for having the audacity to show up somewhere new and have it be "easy" when in fact her story is probably no different from any of ours. She's just worked hard and gotten to where so many wish they could get.
What I wish I could say to everyone who wastes time tearing down Glennon Doyle or Taylor Swift or anyone else who happens to be a little bit more successful is the very fact that you're spending your precious energy tearing down someone else instead of working on growing yourself is the reason why you are where you are.
If you couldn't tell, this happens to be a personal soap box of mine. 😂
I can feel how deeply this matters to you, and I’m grateful you took the time to share it. That idea of “different rungs” and how we project ease onto people without seeing their full story – really cuts to the heart of the piece. I’m so glad it spoke to your soapbox. 💛
Some good points made here. I didn't follow it too closely, but I saw one of the notes asking her to basically shrink and thought it was icky. I'm sad she left. The space feels poorer and slightly murkier as a result.
That feeling - being asked to shrink - really struck a nerve for me too. It’s sad to think that what could’ve been an expansive moment felt icky instead. Thank you for holding space for that nuance. I think we’re still untangling a lot of it.
My take is that most people don’t understand how Substack’s business model works and how they support people to arrive here. If people held that in mind I don’t think they would have been so quick to react. The platform is built on successful writers. Is there space for us all - sure but there wouldn’t be if the big earners left…
Thanks Claire - I really appreciate you reading and reflecting. You’re spot on! A lot of the reaction missed how platforms like Substack are built to support visibility. The discomfort came not from her presence, but from what it mirrored back. So many layers to this.
So so many and I’m in the privileged position to have coaches, mentors and a therapist which is why this work comes easily… well that and my open hearted nature.
Thank you for sharing – it’s so powerful to name the support behind the work. It really highlights how we can’t always see the scaffolding that holds someone’s voice steady, which makes it so easy to misread “ease” as entitlement. Your open-heartedness comes through in everything you write. And I truly mean that. 💛
Aw that’s kind Sam. And yes that scaffolding is a beautiful way to articulate it. I wouldn’t be here or have continued here if it wasn’t for my husband. He’s an incredible coach and nervous system expert, I’m surrounded by scaffolding and I learnt a lot very quickly about integrity online. ✨😅💖
A very thoughtful piece. I appreciated your perspective as a writer here who celebrated Glennon’s arrival and was disturbed by the negative response, which felt like scarcity thinking, as you noted. I hope we can all learn something from this & the questions you pose are an excellent starting point.
Thank you, Amy -especially for bringing in the tension around scarcity thinking. I think a lot of us wanted to celebrate her arrival, and felt jarred when the tone shifted. Your comment holds that conflict so generously. I’m really grateful you’re here.
Nicely said. I think it’s possible to notice a change in energy, to feel the tremor in the room, without reacting from scarcity or wishing anyone away. Just because we name what feels disrupted doesn’t mean we’re intimidated or resistant to growth. Sometimes it’s simply an observation, a questioning of what this space was and what it’s becoming. Two things can be true at once—we can hold both care and curiosity. We can feel the ground move and still trust our place on it.
Yes. This is it. Holding care and curiosity at the same time and resisting the urge to react with fear just because something feels different. Your phrasing here is stunning. Thank you for sitting with the complexity of it all.
Grace really is the balm for all of this, isn’t it? Thank you for reminding us that space can stretch - and that conversation, not competition, is what makes it all feel worthwhile. 💛
“It’s easier to say “they don’t belong” than to sit with the ache of wondering if we still do.
It’s easier to critique someone else’s presence than to feel the tremor of self-doubt when the room starts shifting around us.”
This!
Thank you Claire. I really felt the weight of that line when I wrote it. There’s such a quiet ache beneath those moments of judgement or resistance, isn’t there? Not about them – but about where we stand now.
I had to write down, "the creative world says it loves vulnerability, but only if it's not paired with influence" because it really struck me as a truth I hadn't been able to put into words. Beautifully said.
That line you pulled out is one I kept circling in drafts I’m so glad it landed. There’s something quietly devastating about how we celebrate vulnerability only when it comes from the “right” person or context.
Well said. It’s sad the way people do one another while craving support themselves., without the seemingly simple knowledge that the wind lifts every wing in the room ….
Yes… craving support but forgetting that the wind lifts every wing and a rising tide lifts all boats. We all rise when we stop treating each other like competition.
I’m sorry this has happened to Glennon. The irony is you showed up as you are. Something we need more of.
Outside of follows, likes and subscribes., sooner or later what everyone really wants is authentic connection., to feel ourselves and to be allowed to without judgement.
To stop the crazy. It’s been so long., and so forgotten that few even recognize the opportunity when they see it and when they do it scares the ___ out of them.
Yes yes yes. Thank you for singing the truth here! Yet another successful woman skewered, and thank you for exposing the scarcity mentality and virtue signaling that lives beneath this, yet another, attack on a woman getting big, shining, doing it her way.
Yes yes yes back at you! I so appreciate you naming the dynamics beneath the surface - especially how often “scarcity” shows up dressed as concern or principle. Thank you for reading with such fire and clarity.
This is really thought provoking - the visibility thing makes a ton of sense. Also it makes me think of the societal wounds women bear. We are not supposed to be “too loud,” “too visible,” “too much,” etc. the example of Taylor swift really stood out to me - as a woman who basically does what she wants, she’s so so criticized all the time. And I really think women like this are often seen as a threat to the patriarchy. And if that’s the case then there’s women clearly embedded in the patriarchy that are perpetuating these ideals of persecuting women who are in the limelight. It’s a truly vicious cycle. It’s sometimes subconscious. Like the subconscious wounding of our society.
This is so beautifully expressed, Kelli -and yes, that exact Taylor Swift tension was on my mind too. The way visibility becomes a threat, especially when it’s embodied by women who don’t shrink themselves. And I agree, much of the backlash is subconscious, conditioned, inherited. Thank you for articulating it so powerfully.
I didn’t know who Glennon was and to be honest I didn’t watch all of the welcome video because I didn’t understand the why of the video, but I liked the idea of someone writing about stopping people-pleasing, so I subscribed to hear more. And then I started seeing some posts against Glennon being on Substack. I wish I’d said something then, but didn’t want to get involved because I am not a writer and because I have been a target and don’t relish being a target. But I wish I had said something about understanding how hard it is for writers to get recognition, get published, make a living BUT isn’t there enough room here for everyone who is not writing hate? I wish Glennon had not left. I hope she comes back. And I hope all the writers who are not Glennon know the worth of their writing even if they are not famous or rich. I value so many of you and to me, there’s always room for one more 🙏🏼 Penn x
Penn – this comment moved me. Thank you for your honesty, and for staying with your own values even when the energy around it felt heavy. “There’s always room for one more” is such a beautiful and grounded truth. I hope she comes back too. 😢
I didn’t flinch when Glennon showed up. Maybe because I didn’t know who she was. With Maddow or Katie Phang, I felt the air shift—like someone famous had just sat down at the kitchen table. But with Glennon, I read her words without expectation. Just… curiosity.
And it reminded me of being a teenager in post-punk Northern England. Loving bands no one else had heard of—then quietly resenting them when they got big. I wanted to keep them mine. Intimacy felt like something that couldn’t survive mass attention.
I think a lot of us are still carrying that. The part that confuses belonging with exclusivity, or safety with smallness.
But maybe the room is bigger than we think. And maybe someone else’s spotlight doesn’t mean we disappear.
Still sitting with it.
—Robert
Robert, what a gorgeous reflection. That post-punk metaphor - wanting to keep things small and special - really struck a chord. You’ve captured exactly why intimacy and visibility can feel at odds, even when they don’t have to be. So beautifully said.
Thanks, Sam.
There’ something about those formative moments. When something reveals or reinforces our identity, we quietly, protectively claim it as ours,. Especially when the world around us feels loud, fast, and is seemingly fraying at the edges.
Hi Sam! I had never heard of this person, a friend sent me a link to an article about her after she had already left.
From what I can tell, she joined Substack and immediately started charging for access to her content. If that’s what happened, I totally get why people didn’t like it.
And that’s not a knock on her, it’s just the reality of making money online. Whenever you have a group of people on a platform who are trying to make money, and then one of them DOES start making a LOT of money, someone is going to complain.
It will happen here too, unfortunately. I suspect the writers who had been grinding here for months with little $$$ to show for it yet didn’t like the fact that she could walk in and start making money as soon as she arrived.
You are exactly right, it’s hypocritical for us to say Substack is different and everyone is welcome, then we start running off people who aren’t following the unspoken rules. As you said, it’s simply gatekeeping. Thank you for putting into words what I think a lot of us were already thinking.
Mack! Appreciate you sharing this. And you’re absolutely right, this is where it gets thorny. The irony is, Substack encourages all of us to turn on paid from day one and let’s be honest, someone like Glennon probably didn’t just decide to hop on without a PR plan and a meeting or two with the Substack team. It’s how the platform works: visibility + monetisation from the start.
So the backlash wasn’t really about her charging - it was about what her presence symbolised to others who felt they were grinding without being seen. You’re spot on that it’s all wrapped up in money, pace, and unspoken expectations. Always love your thoughtful take on this stuff - glad we’re in the same corner of the internet.
Good morning, Sam! You’re exactly right, Substack encourages us to monetize immediately.
I’ve been in social media for 20 years now, and this cycle always repeats. Everyone starts out at zero. Eventually, someone figured out how to grow faster than everyone else, and how to make money doing it.
As soon as that happens, criticism will start. The first time I ever got attacked online was the day I announced my book deal. I hate to say, but the same thing will happen here. As soon as some of the people we all know and love start enjoying real success from their efforts on Substack, the attacks will begin.
When someone has success, we can either be happy for them and try to learn from them, or we can attack them out of jealousy. Unfortunately, some people choose the latter.
I agree. This shows that the 'great community over here' feels safe as long as somebody stays average and highlights how, no matter what, there is still so much fear and competition. (I don’t believe there is competition, nor do I think readers are 'mine' or 'yours'). It just makes me wonder what kind of culture is being cultivated here on this platform.
Yes! You’ve put words to something I was circling. The illusion of safety only working when no one shines too much. And I’m with you - I don’t believe in competition in the way it’s framed either, but the fear it stirs up is very real. So much to reflect on here.
I've read a number of posts around this since this incident itself is taking up so much space, oh the irony, but so far you have captured the nuance, layers and complexity of what this fuss is really about. Well said. These are issues we will all need to grapple with as other bigger names join. As for me I'll be sitting in my corner of the cafeteria quietly nurturing and tending my own garden.
Terry, I absolutely love the image of “tending your own garden in the corner of the cafeteria” – such a perfect metaphor for how many of us quietly hold space here. Thank you for seeing the nuance. That was exactly my aim, to name the energy shift without falling into a binary response.
"Not because they’re doing anything wrong. But because they remind us that some people start on a different rung."
Maybe she started here on a different rung. But she very likely started somewhere else years ago on the very bottom, just like everyone else.
And now people are belittling her for having the audacity to show up somewhere new and have it be "easy" when in fact her story is probably no different from any of ours. She's just worked hard and gotten to where so many wish they could get.
What I wish I could say to everyone who wastes time tearing down Glennon Doyle or Taylor Swift or anyone else who happens to be a little bit more successful is the very fact that you're spending your precious energy tearing down someone else instead of working on growing yourself is the reason why you are where you are.
If you couldn't tell, this happens to be a personal soap box of mine. 😂
I can feel how deeply this matters to you, and I’m grateful you took the time to share it. That idea of “different rungs” and how we project ease onto people without seeing their full story – really cuts to the heart of the piece. I’m so glad it spoke to your soapbox. 💛
Some good points made here. I didn't follow it too closely, but I saw one of the notes asking her to basically shrink and thought it was icky. I'm sad she left. The space feels poorer and slightly murkier as a result.
That feeling - being asked to shrink - really struck a nerve for me too. It’s sad to think that what could’ve been an expansive moment felt icky instead. Thank you for holding space for that nuance. I think we’re still untangling a lot of it.
Super interesting Sam. Thanks for this.
My take is that most people don’t understand how Substack’s business model works and how they support people to arrive here. If people held that in mind I don’t think they would have been so quick to react. The platform is built on successful writers. Is there space for us all - sure but there wouldn’t be if the big earners left…
Thanks Claire - I really appreciate you reading and reflecting. You’re spot on! A lot of the reaction missed how platforms like Substack are built to support visibility. The discomfort came not from her presence, but from what it mirrored back. So many layers to this.
So so many and I’m in the privileged position to have coaches, mentors and a therapist which is why this work comes easily… well that and my open hearted nature.
Thank you for sharing – it’s so powerful to name the support behind the work. It really highlights how we can’t always see the scaffolding that holds someone’s voice steady, which makes it so easy to misread “ease” as entitlement. Your open-heartedness comes through in everything you write. And I truly mean that. 💛
Aw that’s kind Sam. And yes that scaffolding is a beautiful way to articulate it. I wouldn’t be here or have continued here if it wasn’t for my husband. He’s an incredible coach and nervous system expert, I’m surrounded by scaffolding and I learnt a lot very quickly about integrity online. ✨😅💖
A very thoughtful piece. I appreciated your perspective as a writer here who celebrated Glennon’s arrival and was disturbed by the negative response, which felt like scarcity thinking, as you noted. I hope we can all learn something from this & the questions you pose are an excellent starting point.
Thank you, Amy -especially for bringing in the tension around scarcity thinking. I think a lot of us wanted to celebrate her arrival, and felt jarred when the tone shifted. Your comment holds that conflict so generously. I’m really grateful you’re here.
Nicely said. I think it’s possible to notice a change in energy, to feel the tremor in the room, without reacting from scarcity or wishing anyone away. Just because we name what feels disrupted doesn’t mean we’re intimidated or resistant to growth. Sometimes it’s simply an observation, a questioning of what this space was and what it’s becoming. Two things can be true at once—we can hold both care and curiosity. We can feel the ground move and still trust our place on it.
Yes. This is it. Holding care and curiosity at the same time and resisting the urge to react with fear just because something feels different. Your phrasing here is stunning. Thank you for sitting with the complexity of it all.
Brilliantly written. Thank you.
And yes, yes, yes to grace.
When we live with grace we eliminate "scarcity" thinking and we know there is always room at the table for more conversation.
Grace really is the balm for all of this, isn’t it? Thank you for reminding us that space can stretch - and that conversation, not competition, is what makes it all feel worthwhile. 💛